Wednesday, June 9, 2010

This Moment

Had the most wonderful weekend with my daughter.  Saturday morning started with her flying in to bed with us during a very loud and lengthy thunderstorm.  I watched my 15 year old daughter sleeping peacefully in between us as we rode out the storm.  I thank God for her, my husband, our life, and the fact that she still crawls into bed with us.  It's all about family, it's all about the connections we share and the love we have for one another. 

Saturday evening we went to the Taylor Swift concert and when she sang her hit "Fifteen," I wept.  There is so much ahead for my girl.  Heartbreaks, successes, first kiss, first formal dance, so many things that she will begin to experience this Autumn when those doors open and she walks through them as a freshman girl.  Thank you Abby-Rose for being who you are, being your Mommy is the best thing I have ever done in my life.  I love you.

Sunday, January 31, 2010

A Conversation With AJ

Last night we met AJ.  He was sitting on a bench in the Prudential Center in Boston with his shopping cart next to him, mostly full of empty plastic bags.  We approached him and asked how he was doing?  He replied in a soft and slight Jamaican accent, and with a smile that would melt your heart, "Well, I suppose I have been better, but all in all.........okay."  We found out that AJ used to be a civil engineer on the "Big Dig" (An infamous construction project in Boston).  He was making a good living until an accident took his sight.  What happened in between, we will never know.  But, there he was on a bench, in the dead of winter, with a cart full of plastic bags.  I had so many questions for AJ, but ultimately left with most unanswered.  I wanted to know where "his people" were?  Where were his friends, his family, his former neighbors, and co-workers?  When I asked him if he had any friends in the area he said, "No, they are gone now."  What does that mean?  Where did they "go?"  I asked if he had a place to stay.  He said that a man takes him in at night and reads him the bible.  He talked about books and film, obviously educated and well-spoken - I could have talked with him all night.  We handed him one of Abby's homemade blankets, (She wanted him to have the one with the horses on it.) a copy of my book, some cash, and a wish for better days ahead.  A piece of my heart stayed there with him on that bench as we walked away, with our full bellies and shopping bags in hand.  How did his community let him fall through the cracks?  He is someone's son, someone's brother, someone's friend.  We left with absolute certainty about a few things; we are blessed, we will never let that happen to anyone we know, and we are better people for having had a conversation with AJ.

For More Information About The "Soul to Soul" Project, Please Visit; And Click On The Link "Soul to Soul."  Thank You

Thank you, thank you, thank you

It was a bitter cold night in Boston.  The wind felt like a knife cutting away at any unprotected skin.  We were driving around, surrounded by the beautiful Chirstmas lights and decorations, looking for homeless people to give our handmade blankets to.  We were having trouble finding anyone and took delight in this actually, hoping that everyone was off the streets on this awful night and inside warm and safe.  All of a sudden Mark pulled to the curb and pointed saying, "There."  Abby and I got out of the car, I stood back as she approached an older Asian gentleman sitting on the cold concrete; his head was bent down, not doubt to protect his face from the wind.  She stood in front of him and he lifted his tired eyes to hers as she said, "Merry Christmas."  For a moment, there was hope, he smiled a very broad toothless smile and said, "Thank you, thank you, thank you."  We piled back into the car and I looked in the rear view mirror at Abby, she was also smiling.  She had the smile of someone who had made a difference in the life of someone else.  Merry Christmas everyone, the gift we receive in giving, is far greater than any we will find under the tree.

For information on the "Soul to Soul" project, please go to and click on the link.  Thank you.

Saturday, December 26, 2009

62 Hours

Christmas has come and gone now, but the memories of the last month linger, and will forever be sweet in my mind. One of the best moments was surprising my 89 year old Father by flying three-thousand miles across the country to bring him eggnog. I had been very concerned over the last few months, he seemed more tired than usual. I kept asking if he was celebrating the season, drinking eggnog, and playing Christmas music? Each time I asked he would say, "No, I need to get some eggnog!" After three weeks of this, I told my husband I needed to go to California for a couple days. I asked my Dad to make sure he was home on Friday between 12:00 and 2:00, because he was getting a delivery that he needed to sign for. When he opened the door, I was standing there holding a big poinsettia and a half gallon of eggnog. He looked as though he didn't know who I was! I said, "What do I have to do to get you to drink your eggnog?" Blank stare..........."Dad, you know who this is right?" "Nooooooo............." he said, "I'm trying to figure out how the UPS lady can look soooooo much like my daughter!" We laughed, hugged, and cried! We danced in our slippers in the kitchen to "Silver Bells," drank eggnog, brought out treasured old family holiday decorations, and enjoyed every moment. I was there for 62 hours....exactly. When it was time to leave, my Dad hugged me longer and harder than he ever had before. We shared "I love you's" and agreed that this had been the best gift ever, the gift of time together. I left at 4:00am, it was so hard to leave. Before I woke Dad to say goodbye, I made him a pot of coffee, washed the dishes in the sink, turned on his tree lights, switched the Christmas music on softly, lit a candle, and set out a Christmas mug with a banana and a muffin. I did everything I could to make him feel like I was still there, and a piece of me still is and will always be in California with my Daddy. 62 hours........the gift of precious it is. When I landed in Boston I called to say I was home safe and he said......"It was a great visit. Do it again! Do it again!"

Friday, November 27, 2009

Full Circle

Yesterday I was driving home from the football game where my daughter had been playing flute with the band and "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas" came on the radio. I wanted to get home ahead of my family so that I could light the fires and set out some food to start off our Thanksgiving celebration. But for now, I was in the car, so I cranked up the music and began singing along. All of sudden, I was transported to a moment in time years earlier with my Mom. I was seated at the snack bar in our kitchen and she was singing the very same song. I was very aware and awake that day......I really listened to her......her voice was joyful and lovely. As I drove, tears started streaming down my cheeks, I looked up to heaven and proclaimed, "I Love You Mom!"

This morning I got up and put the coffee on, lit a couple candles, and turned on some Christmas music to start the day. As synchronicity would have it...."Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas" was on - so I started singing! I was at the sink and turned around to see Abby seated at the kitchen table and she was listening to me sing. There are moments throughout the course of raising a child that you hope your children will forget, and then there are moments you hope they remember - I hope she remembers this morning and that it comforts her one day, just as the memory of my Mom on that Christmas long ago does me. To all of you.......Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas, enjoy each precious moment together.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Sweet Prince

I was flipping through the newspaper the other day when my eyes rested upon an obituary. They had been married for 55 years, he was 88 when he passed, and she wrote, "Rest in peace my Sweet Prince.....until we are reunited." Our lives are "stories" in the making and if we are lucky enough to live a long life, we too will miss our dear loved ones. Hold one another close today - count the moments - and make the moments count. The emphasis each day must be on the present moment and the gifts here and now. I do believe with all my heart that not even death parts us, it's only a temporary removal of our beloveds from sight. We will be together again. But in the meantime, hold close to you those who are still in human form and say the words, "I Love You."

Monday, November 2, 2009

"The Caterpillar's Flight"

The day has finally arrived! I have been writing, editing, revising, shaping, moving, crying, screaming, smiling, laughing, breathing, and celebrating this book for more than eleven years. Today ........The caterpillar took flight! I feel excited, nervous, happy, proud, and at peace. At the moment it was published, I breathed deeply in and out and prayed that it would go out into the world and make a difference. No confetti fell from the sky, no trumpets sounded, no marching band came up the driveway......just me and my cat sitting in my office, on a sunny autumn day, in a house that's 230 years old, on a little plot of land with lots of love surrounding it. What a blessing it is to be able to do what I truly love. Today, I give thanks for the muse that is writing. For me, writing has always been Home. May you seek your highest expression of self today. Go well.